Hype Companion
by Mikey M. Hype
Summary: I, as myself, give my honest review of fanfictions my "bum" act has done.
1. Chapter 1

Hey, guys, this is Mikey M. Hype speaking as myself and not the "bum behind McDonald's" that I usually portray. I figured that, since Doug Walker gives a real review to accompany his newer Bum Reviews, I'd do it, too.

Subject for now is Spiderman 4 by Eddie Kennedy. I'm going to be honest and say "I hated this fanfiction".

The fanfiction itself was such a pain to read because it's so terribly written and paragraphed that you HAVE to read its horrid-ness in order to make left from right...okay, even THEN, you struggle.

I also didn't like just how much Eddie Kennedy showed very little respect the comic-verse and the movie-verse in this fanfiction. I may not read the comic books as much as I watch the movies, but I can understand artistic license, hence why I'm not too upset with the Iron Man, Thor, or the original Spider-Man movies: they made more than a few changes, but kept it likeable and cool.

Unfortunately for comic-book movie fans like myself, Eddie Kennedy either doesn't try harder to make his stories better or he doesn't get what it is that readers want from a comic-book-movie-based fanfiction.

The pacing is all over the place, for starters. It swaps to scenes, puts in pointless ones, and is just too all-over-the-place that it becomes annoying very, VERY fast. And, as expressed by another critic, the action scenes and characters have no descriptions. The author would say "they fought hand-to-hand" or "tossed over at" (which made me laugh), but leaves out who's fighting and who does what to who.

The characters are all bland except for J. Jonah Jameson, quite possibly everyone's favorite character in the Raimi movies. The only reason I could tell the characters apart was because they were mentioned by name. Other than that, it was bland and BORING.

Kletus Kassidy and Aunt May had practically no roles in this fic either. All Kletus did was run around and "be evil", getting no glimpses at all into the character's insanity. And the fact that Aunt May died in the second freakin' chapter means that Eddie was just being lazy. It would have been more dramatic if she was SLOWLY dying and dies either near the end of a story or in the middle so that the hero could struggle with his mindset and ask if his life and duty is really worth anything.

And I do have to agree with the Insane Critic on one thing. I did not like Eddie Kennedy turning Felicia Hardy into the Vulturess. I wiki'd up the scrapped Spider-Man 4 and Ed Kennedy, I think, failed to realize that the "Vulture and Vulturess" on the site were discussions, not confirmations. And it's information like that that kind of makes me glad that the fourth movie was scrapped...though I would've liked to see Lizard on the big-screen.

While I DO admit that I want to see Spider-Man fight Lizard and Carnage, I'd probably prefer it if he did the two separately, not both at once. Multiple villains in a single superhero movie are always kind of iffy, for lack of a better word, and I have to say that two is probably the limit. And, because Eddie Kennedy doubled the amount, it really surmounted to being "awful".

Something that also gives me an ulcer about the fic is that Eddie Kennedy seems to have NO idea on how these Marvel characters work. The way he writes, Lizard is a symbiote and Vulture and Vulturess "transform". I know that some people crack the "Transformers" jokes, but for some reason, I keep thinking of either X-Men's Colossus or Animorphs. Is that weird, or what? So, back on subject, Eddie Kennedy needs to research his comic-verse before he writes a fic about it.

So, while I do believe it VERY likely that Eddie Kennedy probably didn't mean to make a bad fic, I would also like to point this out. I was his age when I wrote my first fight ficand received my first critique. I'll just say that it wasn't nice. When I saw that people didn't like my work, I read books and other fanfictions and took example from them so that, in the end, my works were so much better. I remember that one of my first fics had nine-thousand words before, but when I was done rewriting it, the word count was in the twenty-thousand range and people really liked it.

Eddie Kennedy doesn't have any favorite fanfictions, has no favorite books that I'm aware of, and doesn't appear to heed to any criticism or advice given to him. And any direct contact ala the PM system has been unfruitful, which leads to my belief that he has no idea what he's supposed to do on this site, let alone writing. I think that the thing he needs most is being put under someone's wing and learning from them. Only time will tell if he does this or not.

I'm Mikey Hype, this is my companion review, and I'm gone. Stay tuned for a companion to my next review.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey, guys, this is Mikey M. Hype speaking as myself and not the "bum behind McDonald's" that I usually portray. I figured that, since Doug Walker gives a real review to accompany his newer Bum Reviews, I'd do it, too.

Subject for now is War with the Zodiacs by Nukid. In all due honesty, I think his fics are WAY too overrated.

This fic was actually suggested to me through a PM. I shrugged and went to check it out. After a complete read of the storyline, I looked at the reviews and am kind of surprised it got this kind of attention.

Now, I'm sure that the guy has written at least one fic that appealed to more than a few people and I can understand why people would like this fic at first glance. It IS kind of exhilirating to see a guy get your self-insert in character and portray him or her as kicking butt like nobody's business. And I'm sure most of these Author Fighters enjoyed it.

But then came the stuff I found kind of ridiculous. When it comes to a self-insertion, especially if you're the main character (Don't deny it. Nukid IS the main character.) at least HUMBLE yourself. In one fic I saw, which included a self-insertion, the author admitted that he wasn't that powerful and, rather than be that powerful from the top of the story, he showed HOW he became powerful and had himself lose to someone OTHER than the villain.

Also, his atheism is just shoved in your face and he expects people to be okay with it. If there's one thing I've learned in media, it's this: belief systems are meant to be SUBTLE in whatever they're in. In the Narnia series, C.S. Lewis kept his Christianity talk to metaphorical levels. In the modern day, though, Rick Riordan said that he COULD go into religion in his series, but chose not to for more than one reason, and I liked that approach. It meant that, whatever the person's belief system is, they can still enjoy it because it's based off Greek MYTHOLOGY.

Nukid is many things, but sadly, subtle isn't one of them. He shoves so much at you about himself and, while it does give development, it's too much. Remember in "Twilight", how Stephanie Meyer shoved everything about Edward into your face? Imagine, not a side character, but a MAIN character who's like that. He tells you everything from what he plays, believes in, watches on TV, ethnicity, what he can do, and so much more. This is even more aggravating by the fact that he repeats it over and over and over again and doesn't shut up.

There's something that I find laughable in this fanfic due to ghost-visits to the Author Fighter forums. I found that some key members were complaining about how powerful Sosuke Aizen was getting in "Bleach" (Yes, I am a fan of the series), but when THIS guy made most of his villains overly-powerful, they seemed okay with it. It was kind of funny before, but then one has to take in mind that this was BEFORE Aizen was getting souped up. THEN it's hilarious.

By the way, am I the ONLY one who thinks that the author needs to get his lines straight? His hypocrisy got really annoying, really quickly. What I mean to say is that, at one point, he said that he had nothing against religion and yet, near the end, he said that a villain calling gods these evil, selfish bullies matched his thoughts on it completely. Why say you have nothing against religion when you OBVIOUSLY do?

Another thing I didn't like was his CONSTANT worship of various things. In my Hype Review, this obviously refers to the inclusions of Vash the Stampede from "Trigun", Travis Touchdown from "No More Heroes", and the gay joke involving another author. But this also refers to a point in the fic where he included Monkey D. Luffy: he brought him the heck out of nowhere, he disappeared in the same chapter he appeared in, and the whole thing served no purpose to the story.

There are also more than a few pointless moments, too. The girlfriend/ex's sister is bland, forgettable, and she doesn't even do anything in the long run. The Luffy inclusion, as well as an inclusion of Reborn, also made me tilt my head and ask "what the heck was that?", if you're going to make a fanfic, FINE, but at LEAST give your characters something important to do.

My final word on the fic: it's bad and doesn't deserve half of the hype it got. It's an ego rub, a worship-fest, a hypocritical mess, AND full of holes that remain open. It's just a stupid, stupid, STUPID fanfiction. The person who suggested it described it as "getting stoned with a bunch of friends and you're the first to start sobering up and realizing just how stupid everyone is acting".

Is it the worst fic I've ever read? Nah, I won't go THAT far. The action scenes are pretty colorful and fun to read and I will give it credit for being a different Author Fighter fic for its time. That being said, I think Nukid needs to know that "different" doesn't always mean "good". Like it or not, some people DO prefer predictability because they DO want to see an ending they prefer, elements they're familiar with, and ultimately see how it gets pulled off.

But, like so many other fanfiction writers, I hear that, whenever Nukid receives criticism or reviews from people he has offended on a personal level, he just pulls the whole "it's my fic" excuse. I'm going to make it clear that THAT is the weakest and most childish thing I've ever heard. If an author uses that excuse, they're basically saying one of two things.

One: "I don't NEED to take criticism, I'm perfect and above you, and you can go suck eggs."

Two: "Um...I got nothing to say. Bug off."

My final saying is that I couldn't read one paragraph of his sequel fic. From the first few lines, I gave up because it was everything that this fic was...multiplied by ten-thousand. Now, one of the guys who read a Hype Review said that Nukid admitted to the fic needing a good rewrite, but whether or not he'll actually do it remains to be seen. I, for one, hope he does and gives us something GOOD this time.

I'm Mikey Hype, this is my companion review, and I'm gone. Stay tuned for a companion to my next review.


End file.
